Algorithm-Free Reco List, No. 30

Wholesome masculinity, biker BDSM, and my descent into the world of Survivor

Time for the monthly ride upon carousel of things I can’t stop thinking about.

If you have things you can’t stop thinking about, please tell me about it (or reach out about doing a guest edition)!

Me lately as the CHANI app is all “everything is so bad right now, we’ve made our premium content FREE!”

This deep dive interview with two book cover designers

Official title “Galley Brag #25.” There is no one doing publishing industry interviews like Ezra Kupor. Every time, I learn a bunch of new things, receive no less than three morsels of gossip, and have many a laugh at the photo captions alone. This one’s a great one to dabble with, especially if you’re not a writer.

r/bald

I have no business poking around a subreddit for balding/bald people, but I found myself there after reading kelsey weekman’s examination of the rare place on the internet that both exists mostly for men and manages to not be a toxic cesspool.

Nik Bentel Studio’s Folder Wallet Collection

Look at them! My fave is the manila. Also can’t stop thinking about their RC Car Bag. I’m a sucker for jokes in product form, I’m sorry!

Survivor 50: In the Hands of the Fans

It took me less than 20 minutes to fall for this ridiculous show, if you’re curious for a window into my general wellbeing lately. I haven’t watched Survivor in two decades unless you count the pile of Parvati Shallow clips I dug up during her Traitors run. I am not endorsing this show on a good-bad continuum (I have MANY gripes). It’s more that it moves at a clip, the politicking is bananas, and I chose my enemies faster than I did on the latest season of Love is Blind, which is saying a lot. I am now also reading Escape! by former contestant Stephen Fishbach. So you could say I’m at least temporarily all-in.

Cocokind Ceramide Lip Balm

Sometimes you have to play the stupid game where you either pay for $7 for shipping or pay $10 for shipping plus a product. If that game is being played at Ulta because you can’t find the unscented shampoo that doesn’t destroy your hair anywhere else, this lip balm is a solid solution to the conundrum.

“Los Angeles” by Ling Ma

For the story reco of the month, it has to be this one (also in Bliss Montage). It’s the third time I’ve read it now, and I’ve found something new to obsess over every time. Strange and surreal, about a woman who lives in a mansion with 100 of her ex-boyfriends. Also about memory and class and loneliness, as most of my favorite stuff is.

“Transmuting AI Shame Into Erotic Self-Respect” by Ayana Zaire Cotton

Really incredible essay that goes beyond the reasons often cited for AI’s wretched impact on society (environmental, labor, creative, etc.) and moves into a cultural invitation toward a more embodied integrity. Whole thing is well-researched and excellent, but I especially loved this part:

This is a break in the status quo, shall we decide to take it. A deep departure, in “business as usual”. The possibility this presents is a radical reimagining of how we labor, how we access nervous system safety inside the art of slowing down and the liberation of “enough”. AI feels like relief because it extends our capacity. This is only soothing if operating at max capacity is how we access safety inside our body. In the age of AI, refusing self-sacrifice graduates from self-care™ to a political act of refusal.

Pillion (2025)

Absolutely incredible film! Like yes, it’s about a shy mummy’s boy who gets his ass dommed to the moon and back by Alexander Skarsgård. But it’s also about love and grief and self-discovery and how you should never select the first entry in a six book series (not to mention one written by Karl Ove Knausgård) as the inaugural selection for your book club.

This newsletter brought to you by:

• An XL bag of Mamba from Ralphs.

• Experimenting with screen-free “half days” on weekends where for various logistical reasons I can’t commit to a full 24 hours. So far it is NOT working! But I am dedicated to ongoing experimentation.

• The new packaging on La Colombe’s cold brew (my #1 grocery store pick), which I’m convinced came with a formula tinkering.